Deb Crowe Schlosser Beats Cancer

This is not a crow, as you can probably easily tell. It’s what we call a Thrusher or “Trushy” here on St. Thomas. They sing really well but most folks think of them as “trash” birds. This one in particular is named Lefty, after her mangled left foot. She is actually the original Lefty, as I didn’t get my diagnosis until after she & I had made our acquaintance.

I started feeding her little bit here & there. I make a certain little noise & she comes swooping in to sit on a branch. She now shows up multi-times daily for her feedings – that was a pear in that photo. Today she had watermelon & banana. She is getting really comfortable with me & just kinda hangs out near by when I’m around. Or starts squawking loudly if I’m not moving fast enough. Comfort from my fine feathered friends.

Today marks 4 days after Round 2 of the chemo that looks like cherry Kool-Aid. I have a terrible taste in my mouth that really prohibits what I can stomach eating. Even water tastes terrible right now. My teeth hurt. My scalp has been aching. I’m not nearly as energetic as I normally am, but I think I was better prepared for Round 2 & am handling things so much better this time, even though it still ain’t fun one bit. This ends the venting portion of this post.

My hair is gone. I refuse to wake up in a puddle of my own hair so a couple of days ago Steve assisted as I shaved my own head. Until I got to the back part where Steve stepped up. It is shocking to look in the mirror. That’s not what I look like, is it? Dang. And I know my people will tell me that I look great even shorn but it’s still an emotional thing to reconcile. Will need a bit of time on this one. OK – this is the end of venting.

And the story of a Phoenix is really resonating with me right now. My body still seems like such a foreign thing – diseased & shrinking. I guess when the phoenix was taking his dive, he wasn’t having the funnest of times either. But when I rise – I have high hopes. Not sure how to get healthy while I’m fighting this, but I’m hoping to figure it out. And get stronger physically like I had tried to do earlier this year. Ideally through Mexican food & cold water.

I believe in miracles. I am hoping that I deserve to be blessed with one & that this horrible thing will just disappear overnight so I can go back to loving the life I’m living. In the meantime, here’s a group hug. Love you all

PS – Also, I very very very much DO NOT want anyone of y’all to go through this so go get checked out. And make your doctors listen to you.